Death is Only the Beginning
by Melinda724
Summary: Severus Snape was a good man... he was simply dealt the wrong cards. Now, he has a chance to change things. Will he sacrifice power for love, or is it his fate to forge his soul in the Dark Arts?
1. The Playground

"_Look at me."_ The boy's familiar green eyes widened as the small black ones stared at him intensely. Then darkness closed in on Severus Snape.

It was cold. Not the kind of cold that froze things, but the kind that settled into your bones and made it almost impossible to get warm again. Severus opened his eyes and looked up. He was staring at nothing, lying flat on his back and his limbs felt like noodles. He slowly curled and uncurled his fingers before moving his head left and then right, testing his strength. _How long had he been lying here?_ Severus blinked as he thought the question, then quickly discarded it for a more important one: Where exactly was_ here_?

He raised his head, glancing around and out of habit reaching into the pocket of his robes for his wand. It was not there. Unperturbed, Severus sat up fully, then got to his feet. The cold had subsided to a mere chill, and his hands and feet had gone rather numb and tingly. Rubbing his hands together, the pale faced man looked all about him, seeing nothing… and then he spied a door.

It was white, with a huge golden knob, and appeared to be standing alone in the strange grey nothingness. Without hesitation, Severus grabbed the knob and opened the door. He half expected it to be locked, but instead he was met with a view of a playground that looked hauntingly familiar. A merry-go-round and a forlorn looking jungle gym glittered brilliantly in the sunshine. He blinked his eyes in the light, as a warm breeze hit him in the face. After the dankness of the grey place (as he had come to call it) it was very welcome.

"Hello, Severus, my boy." A familiar voice sent a spasm of shock though his body as he turned his gaze to a bench on the left of the playground and saw sitting there none other than Albus Dumbledore. "Headmaster." Severus nodded his head once and stepped away form the door, which closed with a slight clicking sound. He was not surprised to see the dead wizard here, after the strangeness of everything else.

"It is done then, I assume?" Severus said as he sat down next to Dumbledore. "I am dead, and this is the afterlife?" He looked around, not very impressed. Dumbledore chuckled, his blue eyes twinkling merrily.

"No, Master Snape… this is not the afterlife, this is an in-between place.. And you are not dead, only mostly so." He adjusted the spectacles on his nose and continued. "Do you know what this place is?" He asked. Severus though for a moment, looking around at the green grass and the forest trees a short distance away. His face grew impassive as a memory of laughter caught him suddenly like the breeze had.

"This is the playground where she and I used to-" He stopped mid-sentence, looking at the ground and not elaborating further. Dumbledore placed a hand on Severus' knee, patting it comfortingly.

"I am glad you remember. However, this is not the _actual_ place… only a figment of what you would deem the world between the worlds to look like." He swept his arm wide. "This is your representation of it." Severus looked thoughtful for a moment as he pondered this. It was strange to think that his mind, so long submersed in the dark arts and the Dark Lord's doings could still conjure up so peaceful of a place.

"Am I to go on then?" He asked after another moment. Inside he was curious as to where he would possibly be sent to next. The old headmaster looked solemn as he stared at Severus, seeming to weigh him in.

"Would you like to die, Severus?"

The question came as a shock. He didn't think he had much choice in the matter. It had been done, hadn't it? But he voiced none of these questions, for only one word was able to escape his lips at this point. "No." Severus winced as he heard the sharpness in his tone. He hadn't meant to speak so abruptly. Dumbledore did not appear to notice however, as he sighed and then looked fondly at the merry-go-round. If Severus didn't know any better he would have thought the old man fancied having a go on the muggle contraption.

Dumbledore spoke. "You do not have to die, Severus. You can go back… no, not back to the present time I am afraid. It is much too late for that." Severus thought of his rather messy and somewhat embarrassing death. Indeed, how could one come back from that? Severus said nothing, but looked at Dumbledore and waited for him to continue.

Dumbledore looked at Severus, his twinkling blues eyes belying some mischief at foot. "No, you may not go back to the present, but you may go back to the past… what if you had the opportunity to change certain things in your life?" here Dumbledore looked sad. "You have been a tool. A finely sharpened double edged knife used by two masters until you had almost become dull. You've been robbed, Severus. For that I am so sorry."

Albus Dumbledore raised his hand and gripped Severus on the shoulder. It was almost in a fatherly way, and Severus felt tears come unbidden to his eyes. This man had been the closest to a real father he had ever known. Still, he said nothing. His thoughts were racing back and forth, guessing at what the wizard was saying but still not fully comprehending.

"You can go back… back to a time where you shall have the chance to right some wrongs in your own life, my boy. The cards are in your hands. Should you choose to return, you will have all the memories of this life, a full thirty eight years, and the sorrows that go with them. That I am afraid is your penalty. But you can use these memories to change things, if you should so wish." Dumbledore looked at Severus, waiting for his answer.

"I…" He paused a moment, wondering what he should do. Time stretched on. The breeze caressed his face and yet the sun stood still in the sky. He had no idea how long had passed before he finally gave his answer. "Yes. Yes I would like to go back… to have a chance to change things…" A memory flashed before him and Severus saw a stunning red head with emerald green eyes smiling at him. _Lily_. He turned to face Dumbledore, but the old man was gone. When he looked back at the playground, it had grown dimmer looking. The whole area looked as though a cloud had covered the sun, shading everything.

Severus felt his eyelids growing heavy. He tried to force them to stay open, but to no avail. Strangely, the last thing he saw before they closed the last time was Dumbledore sitting happily on the merry-go-round.


	2. A Familiar Summer Day

**Disclaimer:** A lot of this is taken from the actual book by J.K. I didn't write it. I'm not an author making millions just the writer of a fanfict.

It was warm. Severus opened his eyes, feeling a strange heaviness in his head, as though he had just woken from a very deep sleep. A cool breeze drifted past him and his mouth gaped open in amazement as he recognized the surrounding area. He was at Hogwarts, sitting under a tree near the lake. A potions book lay across his lap, its pages worn and creased and looking very badly marked in. He frowned at it for a moment, then his eyes widened in surprise. _Well no kidding_, he thought in amazement.

"All right, Snivellus?" A bespectacled boy with wild black hair addressed Severus with a mocking sneer on his face. Severus felt the old familiar loathing immediately, and whipped his wand out quick as lightning, dropping his book in the grass.

"_Expelliarmus!"_ James Potter yelled, and Severus groaned inwardly as his wand flipped out of his hand. Did thirty eight years of experience count for nothing? Severus Snape cringed as he knew what was coming next. _Why did it have to be on this day of all days?_ He thought to himself as he made a dive into the grass for his wand. Potter flicked his wrist.

"_Impedimenta!"_ A few people laughed as Severus was stunned by the jinx. A crowd was gathering now, and the boy Snape cursed his own stupidity for the second time. Attempting to get out of the jinx was impossible, yet he tested the movement of his limbs anyway, to no avail. He glared up at the four boys smirking down at him, which was about all he could do at the moment. He knew he could not use non-verbal magic on them yet, as everyone would wonder where and how he had learned spells far more advanced than his fifth year studies.

His proclaimed nemesis grinned at him. "How'd the exam go, _Snivelly?_" He asked. Peter Pettigrew tittered while Remus Lupin merely looked uneasy.

"I was watching him… his nose was touching the parchment," said Sirius Black with a cruelness in his tone. "There'll be great grease marks all over it." He laughed. "They won't be able to read a word." Several people laughed loudly, and Wormtail, the little rat, guffawed again rudely.

Whereas last time he had struggled against his invisible bond, this time Severus remained quite still, his black eyes staring up at Potter with pure maliciousness. "_Just… just wait, Potter," _He spat. _"Until I ...p- prove you lot wrong…"_ The boy with the glasses froze in his expression for a moment, seemingly a bit startled by the Slytherin's words. He recovered quickly however, and with a large approving grin from Sirius, said in a casual voice, "_Levicorpus!"_

"Good one James!" Sirius exclaimed loudly to his friend. "That's rich, coming from you," He said coolly to Snape. "What're you going to prove, Snivelly? That your nose is the largest in the world?"

Severus had been instantly lifted upside down and now he hovered there, his robes falling over his head and revealing the hated graying underpants beneath them. The jeers and catcalls he could hear through the fabric of his school clothes only deepened his already canyon-deep hatred for the Marauders. Barely suppressing the urge to retaliate, he calmed himself by remembering that he was here to change things…

"Leave him ALONE!" The familiar feminine voice caught Severus' breath in his chest. Tears came almost to his eyes at hearing her speak after so long, and he waited eagerly to see what would happen next. James and Sirius, looking around, spied Lily walking towards them. Sirius grinned at his mate as James automatically brushed his hand through his hair, making it look windblown and rather handsome. Unfortunately this broke his concentration on the levitation spell and Severus hit the ground with a thump.

"What's up, Evans?" James said casually, as if there hadn't been a boy hanging upside down in midair before their very eyes a mere second ago.

"Leave him alone," Lily repeated. She glared at all four of the boys, and Lupin shrugged apologetically but said nothing. "What's he done to you anyway?"

James seemed to give this question some serious thought before answering non-chalantly, "Well, nothing, actually… it's more the fact that he _exists_ in the first place if you know what I mean…" Most of the students gathered round to watch laughed at the joke, all except for Lily and again Lupin, who conveniently had his nose buried in a book. "Go out with me Evans," James said loudly. Severus could have bitten off his head. "Come on, go out with me, and I promise I'll never bother old Snivelly here again!"

Lily's face extorted into pure rage, and she pulled out her wand and pointed it at James' head. "You're nothing but an arrogant bullying toe rag Potter! I wouldn't go out with you if it was a choice between you and the giant squid! Now leave him alone!" During this heated exchange, Severus had managed to crawl over to where his wand was lying, and had picked it up and pointed it at Potter's legs.

"Oi!" Sirius yelled as he spied Severus. It was too late, for at the exact same time Severus yelled _"Tarantalegra!"_ Immediately James' legs began dancing around wildly, making him go in all different directions at once. Now those gathered to watch were snickering at the Gryffindor instead, and some even looked to Severus with nods of approval. Lily smiled at Severus, her green eyes glittering playfully. She pointed her wand at James and said "Accio Wand" quite calmly, then immediately did the same to Sirius, Peter, and even Lupin, though she did the last with a somewhat apologetic look.

Holding five wands now, Lily smirked and crossed her arms as James danced round in circles, his now wandless friends attempting to find a way to make him stop. Severus watched the red head with a pang of heart ache. _She is so beautiful_, he thought to himself. Moving closer to stand beside her, he grinned broadly when she looked up at him.

"Have you studied for your last OWL?" She asked him with a smile on her face. He nodded; of course he was fully prepared. His last OWL was Defense against the Dark Arts. Lily grew quiet for a moment, then said to him, "Come on Sev, let's get out of here." She handed the stolen wands to a Ravenclaw standing there, then linked her arm with Severus' and they turned to go.

"Oi! You There! Where do you think _you're_ going?" The unmistakably crass voice of Sirius Black halted them in their tracks. Severus turned around, and landed flat on his back as Sirius' fist hit him squarely in the nose. Stars swam before his watering eyes; He could feel his nose getting more swollen by the second. He could vaguely hear Lily's shriek of angered disapproval, and managed to open his eyes enough to see her hit Black with a perfect bat-bogey hex. He smiled in spite of the pain.

Meanwhile, the dancing jinx worn off, Potter had moved in closer to Severus when he'd been punched in the nose. He was now standing above him, pointing his wand down at the Slytherin. He lowered his voice, so only Severus could hear him in all the commotion. "_You listen here, Snape… stay away from her if you know what's good for you. She belongs with a Gryffindor. Sh-_" He seemed about to say something more but a stern voice rang over the grounds, silencing the mirth of the students enjoying the fun.

"WHAT is going on here?" It was professor Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts. His robes were a brilliant silvery blue, and although his face and tone were commanding his bright blue eyes belied merriment at seeing the young wizards enjoying themselves. Severus squinted his eyes and attempted to see the venerable old man through the tears. He felt a hand on his arm, attempting to help him stand. _Lily_. She spoke to Dumbledore, her sweet voice soft and respectable, nothing at all like the fiery nymph she had been a moment ago.

"Professor Dumbledore, Sev and I were about to go to the hospital wing. Everything is fine here." She gave a pointed glance to Remus, who had retrieved his wand from the Ravenclaw and should be saying something about now. He was a prefect after all.

"What? Oh, yes. Everything is fine here, Professor." Lupin smiled guiltily at the Headmaster, and shrugged his shoulders. Ignoring the rest of what was happening, Lily and Severus headed towards the castle arm in arm, watched by a boy wearing glasses who looked like he had just tasted a very nasty bit of medicine.


	3. Fate's Stolen Moment

**Author's Note:** Ok... I have to warn you that this next entry does get a little mushy. But I am a fan of Severus Snape and I thought he deserved a bit of happiness for a change, so please don't knock it too much. Things aren't always going to be so peachy for him, though I have only a vague idea about where this is going at the moment. So let's just enjoy this chapter for what it is. Thank you.

Severus glanced down at the girl walking beside him, and felt his heart leap with joy. That scene had gone nothing at all like the previous one. Severus thought for a moment about how badly it had gone down before, and a slight frown played upon his face. Lily noticed and tilted her head. "What's wrong, Sev?"

He thought about all of the things he could tell her… after all he had carried his hidden feelings around for so many years. But then he happened to glance back, and spied Potter watching the two of them walk away. It was not over yet. A hint of mockery entered his tone. "Why, nothing is wrong. Nothing at all, _Lil_." He felt her tense up when he spoke her name, and instantly regretted letting his feelings of hatred for Potter get the better of him.

Lily withdrew her arm from his, leaving him feeling oddly cold where she had touched him. "I thought we were having fun Sev." She said quietly. "I was so sure you were going to do something awful back there… I've been worried about you lately. You've been hanging around with that Avery boy a lot, and… and you're my best friend and I haven't really talked to you in a while…" she trailed off and stared at the ground, obviously uncomfortable and not wanting to make him angry. Severus stopped walking and stared at her intensely with his black eyes, drinking in her every movement. He had longed for her so many years…

They were standing in a side hallway, a large window letting in the light from the late afternoon sun. A few tapestries hung on the walls, and a bust of some forgotten witch or wizard sat in a small alcove opposite the window. It was eerily quiet, and Severus couldn't help but wonder whether fate was working for him this time.

Acting on impulse, he reached out and grabbed Lily's hand in his. It was warm and soft. He trembled from being this close to her, but did not let go. To his surprise, Lily squeezed his hand back and looked up at him. He felt lost in her green eyes and at that moment he knew that he was hopelessly and completely in love with her; knew he would forsake the dark arts forever should she ask it of him…

"I _was_ having fun Lil," He said softly. He thought of all the advanced spells he could have used on his tormentors, and was impressed that he had instead cast so harmless of a spell on his worst enemy. "And you're my best friend too." His face stretched into the semblance of a smile, and the girl's face lit up. This was the moment. Again acting on impulse, he pulled her closer to him, nervously leaning his face closer to hers. She closed her eyes as their lips met and locked, and Severus dropped her hand to wrap his arms about her waist. Lily's arms found their way around his neck, and in the golden sunlight streaming through the window they stood there for what seemed an age.

He did not want to let her go. The scent of her hair was overpowering and the feel of her so close to him was a dream come true. The one thing he had truly longed for so many lonely years… years full of regret. Now, now he would have a chance to redeem his actions.

Lily sighed and leaned against his chest. Not quite knowing what to say, Severus felt a brief awkward moment when his teenage self seemed to get the best of him. Reminding himself that he was finally holding the girl he had dreamed about his entire life, he held her tighter to him. _"I love you Lily."_ The words left his mouth of their own accord. He was astonished at himself, and yet without a doubt knew that he meant what he'd said. Lily pulled away a little and looked at him. "Really?"

Severus knew his face must have looked crushed, because before he responded she hugged him harder and said, "No Sev! I only meant that I never thought you liked me like that! I… I love you too."

Severus couldn't have been happier. He smiled -actually smiled- broadly and then laughed out loud. Lily looked astonished, and rightly so for he was completely out of character.

"Severus Snape! If I didn't know any better I'd say you were in a good mood for a change." She grinned at him and then laughed with him. They walked down the hallway together, towards the hospital wing, still holding hands and laughing like kids, with Lily making fun of his swollen nose the whole way there. That night at supper, she joined him at the Slytherin table.

Down the hallway, concealed in the shadows of an empty alcove, a boy with wild black hair scowled furiously. He stalked off after the couple left, slamming a few doors for good measure. James Potter was angry at being humiliated. He was angry about a lot of things… some would have said his pride was getting the best of him. He would have disagreed. That night at supper, watching Snivellus and Evans sit together, there was only one thing on his mind: revenge.


	4. A Second Chance

Word spread quickly, and soon Hogwarts was on fire with the news that the James Potter's would-be girlfriend was openly snogging his least favorite person Severus Snape. Some who passed the couple in the halls smirked and some of those who liked the Gryffindor seeker threw things at Severus, but most were either just surprised or indifferent.

The teachers however looked on the couple with approval, viewing the Slytherin-Gryffindor relationship as a mounting stone to house unity. Lily and Severus were constantly awarded points for their respective houses for even the most mundane things, and thus their overall popularity grew. With only three weeks left until the summer holiday, Severus, who was gradually getting used to being sixteen again, was blissfully happy.

Sitting on a couch in the empty common room early one Saturday morning, Severus reread the note he'd gotten from Lily by owl the night before…

_Sev- Forget the Great Hall and meet me at the path to Hogsmead round 8. Breakfast at MP's! Love, Lily_

He smiled and tucked the note away into a pocket of his robes.

"Well look here, if it isn't our very own mudblood-lover, _Snivelly Snape._" A sneering voice spoke up behind Severus and he quickly stood up and turned around, his wand at the ready. Having been caught up in his new relationship with Lily, he'd neglected the few people he'd actually talked to in his own house, not really caring because he didn't have any real friends in the first place. Severus had known that it would come down to this eventually and was not at all surprised to see Avery standing there flanked by the other Slytherins who followed him around like dogs. The pureblood's overall appearance was untidy as usual, his shaggy brown hair forced into a part on the side of his head. His green and silver tie was undone and hanging around his neck.

Avery grinned at Severus. "Think you're all that now, eh?" He leaned cockily to one side, his head tilted in a way that suggested he was about to fall asleep. Severus did not move, staring the other boy down with emotionless black eyes. Avery was undaunted. He knew who his father was and where he stood in the grand scheme of things.

"Where's your girlfriend now, Snape? Probably snogging _Potter_ in the Gryffindor Common Room, eh?" His mates laughed and jeered, and Avery looked pleased with himself. Severus showed nothing, but on the inside that familiar hatred and jealousy reared up, trying to take hold. Severus' hand was trembling with the effort of not casting the spell that would inflict serious damage to the other boy.

"Stupid git," He replied in an icy tone. "You're jealous because the only girl who's ever looked at you twice without desiring to lose the contents of her stomach just happens to be a squib." Severus watched with a mingled feeling of pleasure and cockiness as Avery's face flushed with embarrassment.

"How did you-?" Avery cut off what he'd been going to say, and pointed his wand at Severus. "You'll be sorry you ever ditched us for a _Mudblood_, Snape. You know your actions will be… frowned upon, by those who matter." Severus felt a cold chill creep up his spine as Avery's face slowly spread into an evil smile.

The group remained there a moment longer, Severus pointing his wand at Avery and the other's watching silently. Then Severus lowered his arm. "You have no idea what you're talking about," he said confidently, stowing his wand away in a pocket of his robes. He smirked at the lot of them, then turned on his heel to leave. It was time to go and meet Lily.

"_Stupify!"_ Severus ducked instinctively, watching a flash of blue light hit the wall ahead of him. What happened next was purely reaction, as Severus pulled his wand out of his pocket. He spun around and pointed his wand at Avery, yelling "_Sectumsempra!_" A gash opened in Avery's cheek, stretching down his neck and chest. Blood began immediately soaking through the boy's robes, and his face had turned a pale ashen color as the floor of the common room quickly became drenched in blood. The other boy's mouths hung open in horror, and they backed away from Snape as though he were a dangerous viper looking to strike its next victim. Someone screamed, a girl coming out of the dorms.

Severus had no idea what to do, was stunned into silence. Though only a few seconds had passed, it felt like hours. Someone had fetched Professor Slughorn; Severus could hear the fat old man bumbling his way to the scene. Not wanting to have to explain himself just yet, Severus backed away, and exited the common room. He shook terribly, and his face was drenched with sweat. Hurrying towards the castle doors with his head down, Severus Snape tried not to think about the impending consequences of his actions. _If Avery dies, won't that mean one less death eater to deal with later on?_ The thought struck him suddenly, and then he knew. He knew why he had been allowed to return to this period in time.


	5. The Calm Before The Storm

James Potter sat at the far end of the Gryffindor table, watching the entrance to the Great Hall with anticipation. He was waiting for Lily to come through the door, hoping for a chance to talk to her. He wanted to be the one to tell her that her precious ickle boyfriend had finally done it. He'd finally used dark magic against another student who'd almost died because of it. James didn't know the Slytherin very well. _Allen, or Avard or something, _he thought to himself.

"Drink your pumpkin juice," said Sirius Black. He was sitting directly across from James and was looking at his best mate with concern. "She's not coming, man."

James turned to glare at Sirius. "She'll _be _here. Get off it." James' biting tone stung Sirius, who looked to Remus Lupin with a hurt look on his face. Remus shook his head slightly, indicating that the other boy should indeed let it go. James had been distant lately, and rather snappish. But when rumors spread of the near-death this morning, and who was responsible for it, he had brightened up considerably.

Sirius and Remus were more than just a little concerned for their friend, and they looked at each other from across the table, silently communicating the same thought: They hadn't known James had it that bad for _any_ girl. Remus, stopping Sirius in their dorm that morning when they were alone, had commented wisely that he figured it was more the fact that Snape had gotten the best of James than that James actually liked the Evans girl so much. Sirius agreed, and the two had vowed to keep their friend from getting into trouble over the whole thing.

"Got Quidditch today then, eh?" Remus said, in an attempt to steer the conversation into shallower waters. James didn't answer, only shrugged, his eyes boring holes through the doors. Sirius was getting mad now. Today was a Gryffindor/Slytherin match, the last of the year, and the outcome would decide who took the interhouse cup, for the two houses were neck and neck at points.

"Look James, you need to stop this!" Sirius put his hand on James' shoulder and shook him a little. James looked at him in surprise and Remus suddenly found his glass of pumpkin juice fascinating. The great hall was almost empty as students wandered off to spend their Saturdays doing whatever thing could be counted as wasting time the most.

James' voice was cold and he stared his friends with borderline contempt. "I'll do whatever I damn well please… to hell with Quidditch!" he shrugged off Sirius' hand roughly. He stood up quickly and strode out of the great hall in huff, wanting to get away from the pressure of having to be peachy with his friends. _Quite honestly they're annoying the crap out of me lately_. The though crossed his mind and he was surprised, but knew that it was true.

James headed out to the Quidditch pitch. It was still too early to get dressed for the match, but he needed the time alone to think. The entire time he walked he kept an unconscious eye out for Lily and Snape. _That prat… he doesn't deserve her. Insolent low-life scum-_ His features contorted as he remembered the humiliation he had suffered at the hands of the greasy-haired git. Him. James Potter. Being one of the most popular boys at Hogwarts had inflated James' head to the ninth degree. Girls wanted to snog him and guys wanted to be a part of his group.

The Marauders: Padfoot, Moony, Wormtail, and Himself, Prongs. The four boys had met in their first year and had bonded instantly, quickly rearranging dorms so they could share. James thought of his friends now, but with bitterness. _They think they know everything. They have no idea… could never understa-_ His thoughts were interrupted when he saw a boy standing alone by a tree. He was near the edge of the Forbidden Forest, and beyond the line of trees there was only darkness.

"Peter?" James called out uncertainly, for the boy looked a lot like Pettigrew. Come to think of it, James realized that he hadn't seen the fourth Marauder very much at all the past few days. Peter looked tired. His eyes were bloodshot and dark circles lined them. He looked timid, and kept checking over his shoulder, though he smiled when he saw James.

"Hey Prongs. What are y- you doing out here?"

James raised an eyebrow at the shorter boy. "Going to the Quidditch pitch. Game today. What are _you_ doing out here? I haven't seen you in a while Pete." James watched as Peter looked nervous for a moment. Then for some odd reason his entire demeanor changed. "I heard about what happened this morning. Bloody hell James! Do you think Lily's heard yet?" James was surprised, but as one of his friends at least seemed to be on the same page as him, he cheered up enormously.

"I don't know," He said, running a hand through his black hair and messing it up profusely. "I've been looking for her, but she hasn't been in anywhere that I've seen all morning." _Probably_ _snuggled into some private corner…_ the though came viciously and James' expression darkened.

"Oh, she's been in Hogsmead this morning," Peter offered. I was, erm… there myself today. Bought some quills." James considered this information.

"Is she still there?" If he left now, he would just have time to talk to her before the Quidditch match.

"Oh, she was there bout an hour ago. I'm sure she is or on her way back at that." Peter stared at James. "You… want to go look?" The tone in his voice was unmistakable, and James rounded on his friend in surprise. They shared a silent moment during which each eyed the other, and came to an understanding. James shook his head slowly, his face breaking out into a smirk.

"Nah. Let's get to Quidditch. We'll get some practice in early!" The boys grinned at each other then set off towards their destination, each thinking similar thoughts.

**

* * *

**

"What's wrong Sev?" Lily reached across the table and caressed Severus' face gently. He'd been pensive all morning, and not very talkative. "Is something on your mind?" She had been relishing the last few weeks spent in her best friend's presence. It was a comfort to know that he still remained good at heart, though he'd been sorted into Slytherin so many years ago. She wiped her hand non-chalantly on a napkin. Poor Severus' face was so sensitive to the weather conditions.

He sighed and looked at her, then smiled. The smile did not reach his eyes. "I have something important to tell you Lil." Severus took a deep breath, then he swallowed nervously. He knew that he ran the risk of losing Lily for what he had done to Avery. His only hope was that he could make her understand that he hadn't meant to do it. She waited expectantly, a look of concern on her face.

Severus ran a hand through his hair, unconscious of the fact that Potter did this very same thing when he was either nervous or showing off. Now he looked rather disheveled and Lily grinned fondly. "Tell me Sev," she said, taking his hand in hers and squeezing it. Tiny hearts rained down on them, and Madam Puddifoot walked by carrying her full teapot as always.

"More tea, dears?" She asked with a knowing smile on her face. Lily blushed and Severus shook his head no. It seemed that every adult in the wizarding world knew and approved of their newfound love for each other.

"Ok Lil, but promise me that you'll hear me out first, before you say anything." Lily nodded and Severus told her in detail what had happened that morning in his common room. He explained how he'd been expecting an assault of some sort for a while now. How he'd just reacted with the curse and was in shock over the outcome. While he talked, Lily's face grew more and more unreadable.

"I didn't mean to do it, but…" Severus stuttered for a moment, then said what he had to say. "But he's bad news Lil. Trust me, he's going down a path to darkness." He finished, silently praying that she would understand. He needed her to understand. Lily remained quiet for a while, but didn't pull her hand out of his. She looked into his black eyes, her green ones open and friendly.

"Severus Snape… I love you. While I don't agree with your methods… I do agree with your reasoning." She took a deep breath and looked around. Her words had surprised him, but not nearly as much as what she said next.

"There is… a storm coming, Sev. I can feel the calm. The tension." She licked her lips and glanced out the window at the bright blue sky. It was a beautiful day; not a cloud in the sky. "All of this," she continued, "It all feels, false somehow. I don't know what I'm trying to say… but strange things are happening. People are disappearing, or making decisions that don't seem quite right. You-Know-Who-" and here she lowered her voice considerably. "He is plotting something… I have a feeling no one is safe, and we'll all be forced to choose sides before the end."

It was all Severus could do to not sit there with his mouth gaping open. The fifth year witch was dead on. And ready to handle whatever was thrown her way, it would seem. He felt a grudging respect for her being sorted into Gryffindor at that moment, and knew which side he would choose, this time.

They finished their breakfast, then headed back to the castle. Both of them wondered aloud what his punishment would be. There had been no summons as of yet, though everyone in the school must have known. As they reached the gates, however, Filch the caretaker stood there, a mocking sneer on his face. "Headmaster wants a word with you, Boy." He addressed Severus with contempt, but that was nothing unusual. Everyone knew that Argus Filch was nothing but a bitter squib.

Lily gave his hand one last squeeze for comfort. "I'll be waiting for you in our spot," she whispered, then walked off. The Slytherin took a deep breath then headed toward Professor Dumbledore's office, leaving behind an annoyed caretaker, who had to run to catch up with Severus and make it look like he was leading the way.


	6. The Headmaster's Secret

**Note: **Ok I just wanted to thank everyone for your comments and for reading! You all have been very helpful. This chapter's a bit short and I apologize about that, but I was curious to see where you all thought this story should go. You can see there is some internal confliction in several characters... sooo... let me know your thoughts! Thanks again! )

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"You may enter," a voice called from within the large wooden door. Severus paused for a moment, noting that the voice did not sound like Dumbledore. Without knocking, he entered the office, an impassive and rather bored look upon his face. Professor Dumbledore was sitting at his desk, his attention seemingly enraptured by a small silver contraption. A series of silver balls hung from little chains. When one swung out and swung back in, it hit the ball next to it with a sharp click, and the ball on the opposite end swung out. This repeated several times, and for a moment both Severus and the headmaster just watched it silently.

Dumbledore spoke first, breaking the silence. "I understand you've been having a bit of trouble, my boy." Severus blinked in surprise and tore his gaze away from the swinging silver orbs. "I…" he trailed off, unsure of quite what to say to this. Dumbledore gazed at the Slytherin with piercing blue eyes, his expression as of yet unreadable. Severus did not balk under the pressure, he simply stared back. He was used to those blue eyes.

"Albu- I mean… _Professor_... What happened to Avery today?" Severus was afraid to hear the answer. Although they had heard nothing of a death at Hogwarts, he and Lily had speculated that it might have happened and been kept quiet. Dumbledore did not answer for a moment, merely keeping his hands help up to his lips in a pyramid shape as he seemed to weigh and measure the student in his office. Severus was afraid now. _If Avery was alive and well wouldn't he have told me right away?_ Without being asked to, he sank down in a large chair, staring at the floor.

Dumbledore stood up and walked round to where the boy sat, then kneeled in front of him so that they were eye level. Severus looked up at him, and Dumbledore spoke. "Your eyes, Severus… your eyes have already seen too much for your tender age. You are more knowledgeable than any other student here… perhaps only rivaled by two others at best. You are going to accomplish great things in the future." Here he paused, and Severus looked at him imploringly, though he still did not speak. The Headmaster's words were intriguing, as though he spoke of a secret Severus already knew the answer to and yet did not see.

"Professor, I…" For some strange reason Severus could not speak the words on his mind. it seemed he had settled at last back into his teenage body, for his mind was also settling. Narrowing his eyes at this thought he opened his mouth to speak again, but his words were cut short by Dumbledore, who stood up and addressed him.

"You have difficult choices ahead of you, Master Snape. Whether you shall make the right ones is entirely up to you. Have faith in your…_abilities_. But more importantly, have faith in others besides yourself. I foresee that one day, you shall have to choose between what is right and what is easy. You may go now."

Severus bristled a bit at being dismissed so abruptly, but then looked to Dumbledore. The old man was staring not at him, but at a bluebird that had flitted into the open window and sat on the sill. As Severus turned to go, the headmaster spoke. "Avery is fine. He went home a bit early, but I expect a full recovery and his return next term." Severus nodded, then opened the door.

"Severus," Dumbledore said quietly. The Slytherin turned to look at the wizard. "When you are home this summer and finding yourself in need of solace, consider going to the park." Severus' eyes widened for a moment, but instead of asking more questions, he turned and hurried down the stairs.

Back in Dumbledore's office, a wizened old man spoke to the headmaster from his portrait on the wall. "Usually you give them nonsense advice." He snorted, "Or candy." Dumbledore sighed, then turned to the portrait. "He must choose his own path, Phineas. I cannot shape him into anyone other than who he wants to be." Dumbledore smiled as he watched the bluebird take flight. Down below, he could see Lily Evans sitting under a large tree next to the lake. Phineas crossed his arms and turned his gaze in the direction of Dumbledore's, shaking his head.

"You place too much of this faith in others, Albus." The portrait said.

"Perhaps you are in need of some candy, Phineas," Dumbledore replied. he popped a lemon drop into his mouth and continued staring out the window.


End file.
